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hullo my name is helena. and i prefer dresses to pants.

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The Adventure of the Menacing Dolphin
There's this wonderful cite called http://prillalar.com/drabbles/, and it's terribly amusing... I highly suggest that you try it out... Here's a rather favorite drabble of mine... and the 'Jaime' in this story is supposedly Jamie Campbell Bower, because I adore him. Anyways.

Gracie and Jamie were out for a radical Valentine's walk on a rock. As they went, Jamie rested his hand on Gracie's pinky. It was the most romantic walk ever. But even though the day was so odd, Gracie was filled with supernatural dread.
"Do you suppose it's elegant here?" she asked cooly.
"You dainty silly," Jamie said, tickling Gracie with his Zune. "It's completely lovely."
Just then, a beautiful dolphin leapt out from behind a highlighter and danced Jamie in the big toe. "Aaargh!" Jamie screamed.
Things looked sparkly. But Gracie, although she was pink, knew she had to save her love. She grabbed a meat pie and, like a giant Owen Wilson head screaming bloody murder, beat the dolphin fearfully until it ran off. "That will teach you to jump innocent people."
Then she clasped Jamie close. Jamie was bleeding happily. "My darling," Gracie said, and pressed her lips to Jamie's ear.
"I love you," Jamie said passionately, and expired in Gracie's arms.
Gracie never loved again.